What we had was so fantastic. It was a miracle, a dream. You came all the way from New Zealand to see me. Those weeks we spent together, however brief, will be etched in my mind forever. I can’t stop thinking about you. About how badly I want this to work. I don’t have the money for it, nor do I want to live so far away from home. And I know you feel the same. I’m only seventeen, I’m not ready to make such a big decision. All I know is that I still love you and wish I had an answer. I’m scared without you, I feel so lonely inside. I have ever since the day you walked out of my sight at the airport. And now you won’t even talk to me. I don’t want to live life without my best friend, but I don’t want to hurt you because of my confusion. It’s not fair.
I know you will never read this, but I just had to write it somewhere to get it off of my chest.